Thursday, February 22, 2007

Lana Has Kicked the Bucket

Just to let you know, after almost 7 years of marriage, Lana has finally kicked the bucket. Now i will have to start shopping for a replacement....




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As you can see, our35 pounds of honey we received as a wedding gift is finally gone. It was good while it lasted, so good that we may need to get some more. Maybe we will have to swing by Lillooet someday and pick up some more of this "Cariboo Honey".

Now for some humor:

The cowboy lay sprawled across three entire seats in the posh Amarillo theatre. When the usher came by and noticed this he whispered to the cowboy, "Sorry, sir, but you're only allowed one seat." The cowboy groaned but didn't budge. The usher became more impatient. "Sir, if you don't get up from there, I'm going to have to call the manager. The cowboy just groaned.

The usher marched briskly back up the aisle. In a moment he returned with the manager. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to move the cowboy, but with no success. Finally, they summoned the police. The cop surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "All right buddy, what's you're name?"

"Sam," the cowboy moaned.

"Where ya from, Sam?"

With pain in his voice Sam replied.... "The balcony."

Monday, February 05, 2007

Quote of the day



"Parents used to have a lot of kids, but now kids have a lot of parents." - Making Children Mind by Dr. Keven Leman.

So true! For example I had 2 sets of grandparents, while my children have 4 sets of grandparents. I think it is a bit confusing for the little guys. With our 3 kids, we are overachievers, but a generation ago we would have been underachievers in that department. If we want to spend Christmas with our kids grandparents, it takes us four years to have Christmas with all of the grandparents.

Oh, but our children like getting double the Christmas presents we would have gotten from our Grandparents.

PS. pictures are not really related to topic (they are from Christmas time this year though)

Friday, January 19, 2007

OFFICE LINGO

As technology marches ever onwards and we are assailed with more and more jargon, here is a handy cut-out-and-keep quick reference guide to office lingo.

Blamestorming: Sitting around in a group discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.

Chainsaw Consultant: An outside expert brought in to reduce employee headcount, leaving the top brass with clean hands

Cube Farm: An office filled with cubicles.

Ego Surfing: Scanning the net, databases, print media etc looking for references to one's own name.

Elvis Year: The peak year of something's popularity - Barney the dinosaur's Elvis Year was 1993.

404: Someone who is clueless, from the World Wide Web error message "404: Not Found" meaning the requested document couldn't be located. Example: "Don't bother asking him, he's 404."

Idea Hamsters: People who always seem to have their idea generators running.

Mouse Potato: The on-line generation's answer to the couch potato.

Ohnosecond: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realise you've just made a big mistake.

Prairie Dogging: Something loud happens in a Cube Farm and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.

SITCOM: Stands for Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage.

Stress Puppy: A person who thrives on being stressed-out and whiny.

Tourists: Those who take training courses as a vacation from their jobs. Example: "we had three serious students in the class; the rest were tourists."

Uninstalled: Euphemism for being fired.

Xerox Subsidy: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from a workplace.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

kids in school think quick

kids in school think quick


TEACHER
: Maria, go to the map and find North America .
MARIA
: Here it is!
TEACHER
: Correct. Now class, who discovered America ?
CLASS
: Maria!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK
: Because of the sign.
TEACHER
: What sign?
FRANK
: The one that says, "School Ahead, Go Slow."
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER:
John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN
: You told me to do it without using tables!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN
: K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L"
TEACHER
: No, that's wrong
GLENN
: Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD
: H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER
: What are you talking about?
DONALD
: Yesterday you said it's H to O!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE
: Me!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS
: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Millie, give me a sentence starting with "I."
MILLIE
: I is...
TEACHER
: No, Millie..... Always say, "I am."
MILLIE
: All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO
: Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
LOUIS
: Because George still had the ax in his hand.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Now, Simon, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON
: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __

TEACHER
: Clyde , your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your brother's. Did you copy his?
CLYDE
: No, teacher, it's the same dog!;
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _

TEACHER
: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD
: A teacher.

Saturday, December 23, 2006

probability of White Christmas


The picture shows the probability of a white Christmas in the USA.
For Canada there is no picture but here is a list....

City White Xmas
St. John's 65%
Goose Bay 100%
Charlottetown 87%
Halifax 59%
Fredericton 85%
Moncton 74%
Saint John 65%
Quebec City 100%
Montreal 80%
Val d'Or 100%
Toronto 57%
Ottawa 83%
Sudbury 96%
Timmins 100%
London 74%
Kitchener 74%
Hamilton 68%
Windsor 41%
Sault Ste.Marie 93%
Thunder Bay 100%
Winnipeg 98%
Brandon 93%
Regina 91%
Saskatoon 98%
Calgary 59%
Edmonton 88%
Kelowna 69%
Kamloops 56%
Vancouver 11%
Victoria 11%
Prince Rupert 13%
Whitehorse 100%
Yellowknife 100%
Iqaluit 100%
Alert 100%

Friday, December 22, 2006

Christmas

Now we are 3 hours west of Williams Lake. We just finished our first Christmas dinner. At least 2 more are scheduled.

There is a lot of snow this year, but we keep getting Chinooks every night so it is slowly melting, but by morning the temperature is cold and crisp to say the least.

It is good for snow machining though. ya, lots of fun.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Vacation

ya, done school.

We are had good drive to Williams Lake with bare roads all the way. There is a couple of inches of light powdery snow on the ground here with the sun shining making it almost blinding. Here on South lake side the sun is not up very long this time of year because the
hills get in the way.

The static electricity is crazy around here. Living on the coast, we had forgotten about that phenomenon. But in the interior of the province, getting shocked is just part of life with the air being so dry and all.

got to go - shopping and skating....

Friday, December 01, 2006

Snow

Its a bit foreign for me seeing everything shut down from the foot of snow around Vancouver. Every other place in Canada would be business as usual, but not not the south coast of BC. I cannot really blame them too much considering this was the snowiest November on record. It was also tied for the wettest November on record, which by the way, is the wettest month of the year on average around here.

Although the -12 C temperature was a far cry from the -41 degrees they got in the Chilcotin area 300km to the northwest of Vancouver, it did create some problems. The newly purchased trolley buses failed to work. so they had to run the old 1970s buses. It took me 2 hours just to get from Burnaby to UBC by transit on Tuesday as a result of the ice up. In comparison, driving takes half an hour.

Driving around here did not seem that bad this week because the main roads are continually salted, sanded and plowed, but the side streets are not designed to accommodate any of this activity resulting is slipperier conditions.


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Total snow : 38.6 cm

Total Precipitation: 350.8 mm

Friday, November 24, 2006

no time

I am very busy, so I do not have time to post. I am working on my 5000 word research essay. So much research... this could take 50 hours. Plus I was up to 3000 words and my file got corrupted. Its good I have found a backup! This is only one of 6 classes this term. Oh, the stress.


So here is something instead from Rex Murphy's Point of View.

Source: CBC -the National

Conspiracy mongering is a vicious instrument

Sept. 12, 2006

For some people, any official explanation of an event is always and only a synonym for a cover-up.

For such types, reality is a labyrinth of shadows and speculation, nothing is ever as it seems.

One plus one always equals something other than two, and there is no such thing as a straight line from "A" to "B".

They live in a world of spies and schemers, of aliens who are never seen, corporate forces who manipulate whole countries, governments who plot and kill their own citizens, and where Zionists or Freemasons, the Templar Knights or Opus Dei, have been running the planet for ages.

This is the mentality that argues Roosevelt staged Pearl Harbor, that John F. Kennedy had more assassins than the entire cast and extras of "Ben Hur" - it was really crowded on that grassy knoll - and that Princess Diana was most likely done in by members of the royal family; Elizabeth II, the Buckingham Palace Soprano.

On a pop level, this is the world that finds an audience of millions for the lukewarm stew and plastic history of Dan Brown's fatuous Da Vinci Code and has tentacles that reach towards those true believers in the mystic power of New Age crystals, spirit channelling, of people who talk to trees and fully expect the bored trees to talk back to them.

On a much more sinister level, conspiracy mongering is a vicious instrument of defamation and hate.

The hideous granddaddy of all conspiracy theories is also the most durable one: the infamous Protocols of the Elders of Zion, the document that "proved" the most lasting of malicious fantasies, that the Jews run the world and seek its ruin. The Protocols are loopier than a bucket of eels on a Ferris wheel and known to be a hoax for over a century, but of malicious gullibility there is no end. 9/11 has spewed conspiracy theories almost from the moment the first plane hit the first tower. Among the earliest and the most despicable - an echo of the Protocols here - was that 4,000 Jewish employees stayed home that day. In other words, the Jews did it.

Lately, there has been a whole whirlwind of broken logic and wishful thinking, malice and misinformation trying desperately to dress up as truth.

One of my personal favourites is the claim that no planes at all were involved in 9/11, that those were missiles wrapped in holograms that slammed into the buildings. Hand me a pointy ear, Spock, someone's been watching far too much Star Trek.

The overarching theory is that Bush and the neo-Cons, not bin Laden, not al-Qaeda, not Mohammed Atta and his virgin-hungry suicide team, but slow-witted George and his puppet masters, that they are the real villains, that the president and his plotters murdered 3,000 of their own citizens.

I do not know why we give any oxygen to these extraordinary libels. Detestation for George Bush may qualify a person for many things, but it is not a degree of metallurgy, just as anti-Americanism is not a branch of physics.

These theories that suggest a sitting president and his advisors would murder their own citizenry are a calumny, as lunatic as they are contemptible. They come from the imagination of hate, the pernicious concoctions of minds allergic to reality, and are beneath the dignity of reasoning human beings. For "The National", I'm Rex Murphy.


Saturday, November 18, 2006

How old are you?

Have you ever wanted to know how old you REALLY are? Well now you can find out with this funny site.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Wetttttttt


It is kind of wet around here - to say the least. That is not too surprising considering that this is the wettest month of the year in the wettest city I have ever lived. The picture compares precipitation in a few of the places I have lived. You will have to click on the picture to see it.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

Ralph Klein

I am sure you have all seen this clip by now, but what do you think of it?

Monday, November 06, 2006

BEEF

The 24hrs paper questioned why the BC Liberal Convention ordered Alberta Beef when BC has a multi-billion dollar beef industry. It is worthwhile to point out that almost 100% of all cattle in BC are sold to Alberta feedlots where they are pumped with hormones and grain, slaughtered, and sold back to us in the name of Alberta beef.

At one time BC did produce her own grass fed beef, but the prairies had a glut of grain, so with some clever marketing, cows were switched to grain (which is highly unnatural and unhealthy for cattle). As a result these animals need to be injected with antibiotics to prevent intestinal infections. Yummy! This closed the slaughter houses in BC because it was cheaper to ship cattle to Alberta than it was to ship grain to BC. It is noteworthy to also mention that BC cannot grow grain of any significance because our growing season is too short. There are small pockets where grain production is possible like the Peace Region small portions of the southern valley bottoms.

Friday, November 03, 2006

Vhat are you sinking about?

I saw this few months ago on Global's 6 o-clock news. It has got to be the one of th e funniest commercials ever. Tell me what you think.

Monday, October 30, 2006

random blog entry

Today it got down below freezing. brrrr.

I was reading this week that in 1966 the median age in Canada was 25.4 years old, but in 2006, it is 38.8 years old. Median means half the population is older and half is younger - so I think the average age is much higher. So inother words, if this were 1966, I would be on the dying half of the population. I don't feel old, but I felt severely out of shape playing hockey on the weekend.

Could someone please explain to me why most of the eggs in the Real Canadian Super Store are sold in plastic cartons?? The eggs are always broken in these containers. I had to sort through 6 dozen eggs just to find one that didn't have any broken eggs.

Also, is it just me, or is it hard to research stuff (say for school) on the Internet anymore without wading through the hundreds of personal blog sites? I guess I will go back to using the library.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Expensive places to live

Kelowna has become the second most expensive place to buy a home in the country.
A ReMax Canada survey has the city has jumped to $422,000 this year, second to vancouver ($503,000).

Read more here.

I don't think I can afford that. I think these markets are overrated. What do you think? I would much rather live in Pemberton.

Monday, October 23, 2006

One of my favorite Emails

Please observe this amazing exercise.... read carefully.
















Click on the picture to read the read outline.



Okay now that you understand how hard Indian Yoga is...

Scroll down to see Irish Yoga......





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Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Does TV Cause Autism?

This was posted on Lana's site....

The wetter you town is, the higher the autism rates.

Here is an interesting reserch paper on Autism, I haven't finnished it yet. Leave me a message and tell me what you think. Just another very good reason to be very careful about TV viewing and young children.


http://www.johnson.cornell.edu/faculty/profiles/Waldman/AUTISM-WALDMAN-NICHOLSON-ADILOV.pdf

Thursday, October 12, 2006

I thought this one was hilarious......
!!! BREAD IS DANGEROUS !!!

Research on bread indicates that:

1. More than 98 percent of convicted felons are bread users.

2. Fully HALF of all children who grow up in bread-consuming households score below average on standardized tests.

3. In the 18th century, when virtually all bread was baked in the home, the average life expectancy was less than 50 years; infant mortality rates were unacceptably high; many women died in childbirth; and diseases such as typhoid, yellow fever, and influenza ravaged whole nations.

4. More than 90 percent of violent crimes are committed within 24 hours of eating bread.

5. Bread is made from a substance called "dough." It has been proven that as little as one pound of dough can be used to suffocate a mouse. The average American eats more bread than that in one month!

6. Primitive tribal societies that have no bread exhibit a low incidence of cancer, Alzheimer's, Parkinson's disease, and osteoporosis.

7. Bread has been proven to be addictive. Subjects deprived of bread and given only water to eat begged for bread after as little as two days.

8. Bread is often a "gateway" food item, leading the user to "harder" items such as butter, jelly, peanut butter, and even cold cuts.

9. Bread has been proven to absorb water. Since the human body is more than 90 percent water, it follows that eating bread could lead to your body being taken over by this absorptive food product, turning you into a soggy, gooey bread-pudding person.

10. Newborn babies can choke on bread.

11. Bread is baked at temperatures as high as 400 degrees Fahrenheit! That kind of heat can kill an adult in less than one minute.

12. Most American bread eaters are utterly unable to distinguish between significant scientific fact and meaningless statistical babbling.

In light of these frightening statistics, it has been proposed that the following bread restrictions be made:

1. No sale of bread to minors.

2. A nationwide "Just Say No To Toast" campaign, complete celebrity TV spots and bumper stickers.

3. A 300 percent federal tax on all bread to pay for all the societal ills we might associate with bread.

4. No animal or human images, nor any primary colors (which may appeal to children) may be used to promote bread usage.

5. The establishment of "Bread-free" zones around schools.

Blog - bye Yahoo....

This is kind of funny...

1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time.... I know where my watch is pal, where do you keep yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2 People who are willing to get off their backside to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually!

3 When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". You better believe it! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

4 When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they? They need help

5 When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No Muppet, I paid $10 to come to the cinema and stare at the floor.

6 People who ask "Can I ask you a question?".... Didn't really give me a choice there, did you mate ?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, so it couldn't be new.

8 When people say "life is short". What the heck?? Life is the longest thing anyone ever does!! What can you do that's longer?

9 When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus been yet?". If the bus had come would I be standing here?

10 When you are already waiting for a lift or at a pedestrian crossing and someone comes up and presses the button. Oh so thats what you have to do, I would never have thought of that!